Zulu Delta Heli-skiing in Sweden
OK……….Let’s make this perfectly clear; NOBODY JUMPS FROM THE HELICOPTER!!
I’m not talking about James Bond, Tom Cruise, or anyone with a Red Bull Helmet on. I’m only talking about the “normal, everyday people,” who just happen to use a helicopter to ski; yep, average, run of the mill, plain old Jack and Janes just trying to get in an honest day skiing.
Well, that may be understating things a bit. For those who know what Heli-skiing is, they were every bit as excited as we were when we told them what we were going to do. For those who didn’t quite know, there were some strange questions and remarks. I certainly don’t get offended. It wasn’t long ago when I thought people “jumped out of the helicopter” as well. Having said this, we still smile a lot in out best non-condescending grin when people ask, and comment about heli-skiing.
Person # 1. “So, you grab all your luggage and then you jump from the helicopter?” No. Nobody jumps from the helicopter.
Person # 2. “Did you almost faint the very first step out into the sky?” No. Nobody jumps from the helicopter.
Person #3. “Were you ever afraid your parachute wouldn’t open?” No. Nobody…..blah, blah, blah!
Person #4. “Can you write ‘jumping out of the helicopter’ as a business expense?” No, Nobody, blah, blah, blah………..and do I look like someone who just moved my mailing address to Canada to evade taxes?”
Person #5 “Do you feel the Textron Bell 206 Helicopter has the “fuel to thrust ratio” to counteract the thermal rotor inversions at lower altitudes?” No…..HEY….wait a minute; 9 out of 10 times you drive off in your car with the emergency brake on; where the hell did you get those terms? (AJ….I just made that crap up,,,,,,,,,don’t out me!)
Person #6 “Do you jump out of helicopters because, ‘deep down,’ you’re starving for attention?” Listen Doctor Phil……..NOBODY JUMPS FROM THE….”!*&%$@”……HELICOPTER!
Aw, forget it………now I know why people jump out of helicopters!