For some time in the City of Providence, Rhode Island, there has been a billboard on the side of the road of Route 95, next to the Rhode Island Hospital. It reads “In Pain? Call Wayne.” For many more times than I care to admit, I would drive by the billboard and scream out loud; “In Pain? Call Wayne!” It almost has become a highway battle-cry; kind of like “Who ya gonna call? Ghost Busters!” Yea, simple things amuse simple minds………so what.

This billboard took on more epic proportions when the truth hit me about what I was actually looking at. The billboard is at a very busy and complicated merge of Rt. 95 and Rt. 195; not an area to dedicate long, thoughtful gazes at an advertisement. Initially, I didn’t see the whole billboard. Combining my powers of observations, my deft navigation skills, and my immense powers of deductions, I came to the conclusion that this billboard located next to the hospital, was nothing more than an “enterprising surgeon or chiropractor” using his God-Given gifts to help those suffering individuals find relief from their pain……. in the skilled hands of Wayne!

Wwwwrrrooonng! So very wrong! It turns out Wayne is an ambulance-chasing, “personal injury lawyer” who specializes in suing doctors and the medical community.

I would love to continue this blog post about the statistics and stories of such Attorneys in America, but for some reason, having my bloated, self-described, over-stated, intuitive abilities go down in flames about Wayne’s true motives here, only seems to make this billboard even funnier than before.

Maybe Wayne could help me………

“INSANE? CALL WAYNE!”